#19: "All My Friends" - LCD Soundsystem

I was tempted to pair this song with the newest LCD Soundsystem from the film White Noise only because of the joy I experienced putting that track on repeat when I first heard it. But it’s best to not cheat at my planned process in writing about one song especially when it’s had a more meaningful impact. Such is the case for “All My Friends” especially hearing it live in my favorite music venue.

LCD Soundsystem, to sum it up, is just a lot of fun. Especially if you see them perform at the Metro in Chicago and some random stranger starts dancing next to you. Earlier that night, she offered me some ecstasy and part of me regrets turning her down. I guess I had a fear of being dehydrated or losing complete control of my emotions. I’ve never been the type of person who wants to watch live music under the influence even if it might enhance it. For me, the music is the drug and I want to remember the effect it had on me.

I simply can’t afford to go to concerts the way I used to nor is my energy level entirely up to par, standing for over three hours surrounded by people many of which are intoxicated and obnoxious. But that LCD Soundsystem show was one I’ll never soon forget especially when this particular song kicks in. It’s easily his best song to date.

My first exposure of course was “Daft Punk Is Playing At My House” and I was hooked even back for that debut album. I knew he was mostly known as a NY DJ and record producer that had garnered a reputation for being an audiophile. Eventually he just said, “I should make my own records,” and that’s what he did.

Musically, the band has been described as dance-punk, dance-rock, electronica, electronic rock, and indie rock from a variety of publications. James Murphy being the insane music fan that he is really does combine a lot of influences into one. What emerges is not unlike Sigur Ros in terms of song length only this has infectious energy, a faster BPM and a lot to say about societal issues. Both bands build over long stretches and often are described as repetitive but they achieve different things effectively over time. Well okay, sometimes it’s just a riotous jam about how he’s rocking out to Daft Punk too. Maybe there isn’t much more to it.

“All My Friends,” however feels like a summation of a different time now. It makes me nostalgic for the feelings and experiences I had over a decade ago. An encapsulation of the 2000s with a pulse. Anchored by an insistent piano riff and pounding beat, front man James Murphy sings about the simultaneous joys and anxieties of being young and carefree from the perspective of someone who is not nearly as young and carefree in the present tense. In a way the song is pure nostalgia but accompanied by a sense of loss and longing for better days. Some dance songs sound like they’re on the verge of imploding inside of themselves. This one just finds an eventual release in the inevitability of moving forward despite a constant desire to look back with reverence.

I often think of it as a melancholic party anthem. It makes perfect sense that Murphy supplied the score and soundtrack for the film Greenberg, especially late in the film when the title character attends a party full of young millennials. Greenberg himself feels out of place, out of time and yet longs to feel what he used to feel before shit got real. Being in my 40s now, it’s so easy to remember parties when all my friends were there to drink, socialize and dance. There was a carefree feeling that anything was possible but now it’s time to settle down. Instead of a houseful of 15-20 friends partying, it’s more like a small get-together of 5-10 people talking and enjoying each other’s company.

The gradual groove contained within feels like a combination of the long night gone into overdrive and the morning after, realizing that maybe your impulses got a little out of control. Now it’s time to go to work or spend most of the day off in bed. It feels like a more sincere sequel to “Losing My Edge.” Reminiscing about good times you’ve had with friends, about freedom and partying and discovering new people, and the way that disappears or reduces as you get older, and that joy of discovery and new friendship vanishes. There’s an inevitability that comes with aging even if we look back fondly at times when we didn’t care about how we looked while we danced. We were just grateful to have our friends nearby to celebrate being alive.

He is suffering an existential crisis wondering how he got so old, where did all of his time go and what happened to all his friends. Even if the song is long and carries on at a steady pace, it’s hard not to sense that Murphy is holding on for a reason. Even when this song was performed live, part of me didn’t want it to end, another part of me couldn’t help but think, “wow this song goes on for a while.” Makes me think of when Jason Robards in Magnolia says, “life isn’t short, it’s long.” Sometimes it feels that way and this song somehow captures the joy and the anxiety that comes with realizing that time is passing by and we are not the same people we were decades ago.

The throbbing repetition of a distorted E-bowed guitar, dynamic bassline that uses the low and high octave of the root notes and that jangly, nervous keyboard. Not to mention the drums that keep things flowing while incorporating a fill at the right moments. I’m still amazed when a song can be over seven minutes, containing only two chords and never at all get boring. Because I believe the words Murphy is singing.

I wouldn't trade one stupid decision.For another five years of life

And with a face like a dad and a laughable standYou can sleep on the plane or review what you said.When you're drunk and the kids look impossibly tannedYou think over and over, "Hey, I'm finally dead."

You spent the first five years trying to get with the plan.And the next five years trying to be with your friends again.You're talking 45 turns just as fast as you can.Yeah, I know it gets tired, but it's better when we pretend.

It’s funny to think about the fact that in a month, I’m turning 45. Granted the line above is a reference to 45RPM records - they turn 45 years old just as fast as the 45 records they’re spinning. I’m still trying to get life together, work things out in therapy, exercise more and eat better. When I was 25, it felt like I could do just about anything including having improptu parties or stay over at a friend’s house, staying up til the wee hours. I never really took a whole lot of drugs outside of caffeine but there is a sense of connection back then that feels so vastly different now. Sure, I was depressed and anxious and unsure of what I wanted to be. Some things never change completely. This song makes me want to hit the gym and maybe even cry a little bit.

“Where are your friends tonight?” cries out Murphy towards the end of this song that builds beautifully to a climax of catharsis all while maintaining what was presented early on after more instruments accompany the piano. That’s a good question. They’re all on Facebook and social media for the most part. We’re not going to parties because of jobs, families, hobbies, passions and having a different energy.

I keep thinking I have less energy but maybe it’s just different than it was. I’ll still dance to LCD Soundsystem but even when I heard the most recent song of theirs with its declaration of “I need a new body, I need a new body,” it reminded me how Murphy sneaks in a lyric that I can relate to, while moving to the rhythm of it all. We’re all afraid of aging, but let’s dance anyway while we still can. Hopefully we can still see our friends a couple of times a year as opposed to a couple of times a month like it was when we were 25.

Two decades later, music still moves me and listening to “All My Friends” it’s a song where the word ‘moves’ is applicable with two distinct definitions. I want to not sit around and be lazy. Maybe it’s a time to dance more than ever in the face of chaos. It’s time to change and embrace aging as another opportunity for possibility and growth. Oh, and maybe I should’ve done ecstasy that night at the Metro when I had an incredible time seeing this band live. I just would’ve needed a lot of water in the same way I do now especially since I’m on different medications heading into my 45th year on this planet. Plus, I miss all my friends too.